I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
