I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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