I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
All the doctor said was why
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
