Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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