As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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