He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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