Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED