Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
