i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Will exercising make me less horny?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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