Having a random hookup so left but love u
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize