goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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