We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She's the barista slut.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
