is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
