Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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