Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.