He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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