Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
