I understand Curling. That high.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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