yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I am naked and annoyed.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
