I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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