Small penises have feelings too.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
