It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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