i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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