32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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