All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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