Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Panties = found
Randomize
