i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
