so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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