this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
