Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
3pm strippers are depressing
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
