This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Please, let me fuck your mom
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
