Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize