Redeem this text for a blowjob
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize