so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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