just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
