I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
there's paper in my vomit.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
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