He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
