She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I think I died a long time ago.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Randomize