Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
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