So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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