sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
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