FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize