Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
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