video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my nap took me to another dimension
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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