You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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