No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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