When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Even my vagina gasped.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
