Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
