If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
We are two peas in an std pod
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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