walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
