Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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