I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
