It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
should my penis look like a turkey
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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