i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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